Warpzone

Journey thru the warp

2006-03-26T13:44:00.000+08:00

Ello out there space travellers, time to continue the voyage into the warpzone. Hey time works differently out here so.. erm 3 weeks with no communication is only a few hrs cos there's no gravity out here! (ah-ha).

Abt staying in the hall next semester, really i want to, but maybe its just not possible. Didn't join any committees and stuff the last semester, firstly cos i didn't plan on staying and also partly cos couldn't commit due to reservist trg in Dec. During the trg itself tho, was called up by Peng Tat to run IVP cos rest of the runners were injured.. and by that time had begun to enjoy life wif the B1, C1 and other guys.. so agreed in the hope that maybe could get some 'last minute' points.

Started trg abit, not as hardcore as before of course, began to feel running wasn't such a pain anymore.. quickly signed up for IHG and IFG road relays too. Just finished the last race of the season, Wings X-ctry, a week back and felt alrite abt coming in 6th considering the competition and my commitment lvl. Registered for EHOC flag and got a place but...

All could be in vain cos (even wif Ben putting me down as capn of IHG road-relay) and counting EHOC, i only end up wif maybe 42 pts or so! Ok i know Derrick said he could help me stay if i wanted to but just doesn't seem right.. and if i do get to stay, but in a double room, do i really like Eusoff Hall enough to accept it? Don't really have an answer now, anyway not much i can do worrying abt it, so i can only await the results of my app. (applied to old KR too just in case =P).
Did i mention the most wonderful gal stays in EH too?

That's abt it for worries, other than studies of course, which is always like a background buzzing in my head zzt zzt. Gonna start the 'month of studying' that my MS senior recommends.. but before that had some fun at the EH DnD! ( pics to come, really the ones in the previous post are pretty bad cos my cam was screwd up.. REALLY la the expert said so!) And i tell u it HAD to be something special for me to enjoy it cos i was sneezing like a madman the whole nite. Yeah one of my neighbours got chicken pox, so i went to get the vaccine which might have lowered the immune system for awhile. Anyway its lucky my 'retro' outfit had sunglasses...

' The ballroom had a ceiling. But it didn't stop a shooting star from exploding in our midst! Blindingly brilliant, it seared my vision and set my heart aflame. Then as the light receded, the after-images resolved into a silhouette of human shape. Could an angel from the heavens graced us with a visitation? A faraway voice intoned: " Announcing the C block pageant.."

I'll let the pictures tell the story (ya lazy -_-). And yes wei han u looked good too.

Pixxx

2006-03-07T10:59:00.000+08:00

As it was written, so shall it be...some pics!

Outside MOS..long nite/morn

ZY's bdae celebration at brewerkz

Its true, i'm the shorter one

Tough love

Roger gets some too

Crazy ride

2006-02-28T23:28:00.000+08:00

Whoa its been like almost 3 wks since i've looked at this page? Feel a little bad abt it.. just that so many things have happened, not even sure where to start.

NUS mid-term break ended recently, and it was.. well i'd like to say rollercoaster ride, but there were no lows? Only highs really.. yeah blasting frm one orbit to another hehe. An angel grabbed me by the scruff of the neck and shot me into outer space! Some highlights:

- Did better for maths mid-term test, same for physics and hopefully better for programming. Improvement over last sem is the main goal now><

- Satisfied a WoW itch by playin most of Saturday

- Walked City Square in JB at least 4 times on each floor! Met Wei Wei (unbelievable, is she a stalker or something?) who was meeting her mysterious 'friend', ate quite a bit, heard some cool music in the shops... got an insane pain in my groin area that made it difficult to walk. Didn't encounter criminal activity this time so overall it was a better trip than the last time (mainly cos of the company.. srry yyt/friz/oh).

- Got a new camera at Sim Lim square (ya i'll figure out how to post pics soon). Got irritated by the ah beng guy who made me wait 2 hrs to sell him oasis tickets, saw falun gong handing out anti-communist flyers, and had an interesting Pakistani dish (Tandoori chix with garlic Naan).. boring stuff compared to the nite cos it was our D&D pagaent preview bash at MOS! I must say didn't notice much of the performance, mainly hyperventilating at the sight of the most beautiful contestant. Hall bashes are the best tho, lotsa 'drama' happens and its all ppl u know :P. Drank more than i ever have in my whole life but didn't get drunk, guess i'll save that experience for later. Place was nice, music was alrite.. somebody made it awesome.

- 2 more medals for the IFG road race, winning a race always means more when the team does too. Go Engine! Haha yeah drumming up some enthusiasm there, seems like engine ppl are the zombies of NUS sometimes. Or maybe its just me.

-ZY's bdae celebration on the last day of the week, hilarious to see the guys in their bandanas on the 'operation'. ZY screaming as they stripped him was the best tho LOL.. the guy is just crazy. Hope the resident fellow doesn't remember our faces when he came out to say 'What's going on here?' Rather uptight man i have to say. Pix to come! (Arr my battery ran out at the best part in the toilet, think the images are seared into my brain however ouch!)

Sigh now i know y i don't blog much.. shld be studying for a test tmr~! I'll be writing again soon i hope.

Update!

2006-02-09T20:00:00.000+08:00

Ya actually nothing much to blog abt...but its my duty to update for the sake of my imaginary fans right? Thanks fan1, fan2,fan3!

Let's see, yesterday was IHG road relay and.. we won lor. More importantly, Eusoff won the overall guys, girls and yar strangely enough, OVERALL championship for IHG too! Props to all those who played like multiple games and all, especially Derrick who i heard skipped lessons for like 1 month already (yow). Really can respect their dedication to the hall.

Had an OK run yesterday, luckily, cos someone important was there hehe. Hm prob need to work on my running form.. for a more 'stylo' finish next time =p.

Nothing much happening in this uninteresting (by the standard of a terrorist for example) life of mine? Except maybe that i dropped a 20kg on weight on my foot just now har har. Hope nothing's broken.. ah well won't be running much for awhile anyway. Mid terms coming up yay! I DO so love a challenge -_-"

Well on the bright side, can't be bad as last year right? Oh yeah i knew my fans would say that.. Tks again 1-3! I just lurvvve them.

Which way?

2006-01-31T22:01:00.000+08:00

Last day of CNY hols today, looking back on the past 4 days.. things haven't been too great. Spent most of the time feeling lost, confused, lacking motivation and direction. (Basically means i didn't do anything productive -_-)

Sometimes, you focus so much on one thing, and suddenly its gone.. can't help but feel a little helpless? Suppose its like investments, you have to diversify a little to offset a major downfall in one of them. On the other hand, as my coach used to say, if u don't concentrate on only a one or two areas, you end up being mediocre in all of them. A jack of all trades..

So here's the dilemma and, like so many in life, with no obvious answer. Times such as these, seems there's no choice but to plod along the usual paths and hope for the best. Humans' have a wonderful ability, the power to forget our sorrows and worries - we can look at each new day with a fresh perspective. Memory fail me now! ^^

Oh and i said i would talk abt the 3 interesting ppl but maybe they aren't interesting enough for me to describe them in full so :

Burmese guy - 4.79 C.A.P.. how? 'Study abt 3-4 hrs a day at least' *groan

Indian guy - Definition of the slacker genius.. apparently parties all day but still gets A for math and physics? /respect

American guy- Runs super fast! for middle and long-distance events. Its a different standard over there for sure.

Summary: Combine all these and i'd get the ideal Me ... says Mr Bunny
(\_/)
(O.o)
(> <)

Lightness

2006-01-25T08:13:00.000+08:00

Not much happening lately, its the usual drag of trying to catch up with schoolwork, with the spectre of Exams looming in the background. Yes and the multitude of other problems Life never ceases to 'delight' you with..

Yet, somehow over the past few days, i've just felt this almost unbearable lightness of being. Like a glow in the soul or however you may call it. Problems don't seem so bad, worries melt away.. heck i'd go so far as to say the sun shines brighter, shadows aren't so dark, ad nauseam.
What's the reason? I'll have to refer you to The Reason by Hoobastank :)

On that note, here are some other nice songs i've heard recently:

- It's a pity (Tanya Stephens) --- caught a part of it while walking throught the barracks during reservist, catchy

- Air that I Breathe (the Hollies) --- From the radio, classic song that takes on new meaning for me

-Can't Live, if Living is Without you (Air Supply) --- Another classic i rediscovered while searching for the song above ^^

I recommend Ares >< but if u have my MSN can send u (on weekends only cos their on home comp)

I've also met some interesting characters over the past few days... a burmese, indian and american. Think its time to start getting to know more people as I find u can learn much more from interaction than just reading from books. Why are these people in particular interesting? In the next post... :P

A day.

2006-01-22T18:27:00.000+08:00

Yesterday was a day. And of course it was special or I wouldn't be writing abt it right?? ok got that out of the way. Anyway the day started officially around 1am cos i couldn't sleep, had a lot of thoughts going through my head at the time. Think i eventually knocked off around 3..

Woke up at 10 and started lounging around the house. I had to run the IVP 1500m later and usually before a race i feel like doing..nothing. This time the race didn't really matter tho, some other thing was bothering me. Managed to do only 4 qns of the CS tutorial, watched some TV and then it was time to leave for the NYP track. (A lot of stupid singing and insane ramblings in-between, as my family can attest to)

My mom kindly offers to drive me and i arrive at the stadium a bit uneasy cos there i was, running a race with only 2 weeks trg and coughing along the way. Didn't like the feeling that i was forcing myself to run without the preparation, basically, that i wasn't really there to compete but just to 'fill the numbers'.

Anyway walked to the track and the atmosphere was..underwhelming. Not many ppl around.. definitely no cheerleaders or anything like that. Gd thing i suppose cos less ppl to watch what i expected to be a rather disappointing race, on my part at least. Started the usual warm-ups and i'll summarise the interesting stuff:

- ran into David, an ex-teammate frm HCJC and first thing he says is 'y u so fat now?' -_-

-one of the NTU top runners talks to me and Sunny abt some fast ang moh runner that's gonna compete, 'my last year, last sem..y this happen to me?' he says. 'Who cares' i think, maybe he's trying to play mind games or something.

-watch some of the sprints.. quite inspiring to see team NUS members winning

At the start line.. don't see any ang moh runner.. hm some familiar faces, some not. My friend told me poly and ITE runners had a pretty low standard.. and i was hoping so. Race starts and it seems like a slow pace so i find myself keeping up with the front. Long story short, standard turned out to be lower than expected, i did better than i thought i could, ended up in third place. Which was really alrite wif me. What was strange was that i didn't really feel the pain as i used to, maybe didn't push as hard as i could have, but it left me thinking ' i could get used to runs like this'.

Perhaps, i always worried abt the pain in the past, worried that i would succumb to it and give up halfway (ever a temptation).. but if i accept not having to push to the max everytime, continuing to run wouldn't be so bad. It might even lead to better things than before.

Okayz, wrote more than i wanted to abt IVP, cos i really wanted to write more abt a little fairytale that happened after.

Once upon a time, there was a weary adventurer who had become rather lost in his journeys throughout the land. Every step seemed like a burden and each sunrise brought only new frustrations with it. One day, the adventurer came upon a place known as Hart, which was under the shadow of a terrible beast. The people of Hart pleaded with the adventurer to help them.

Now the adventurer in his younger years had once been a proud man, perhaps too proud, and it had cost him much. He continued to drag Regrets like a ball and chain causing deep furrows wherever he walked. This plea for help seemed like the last chance for him to redeem himself.. and Hart. Would he take it?

Still unsure, the adventurer nevertheless travelled to the lair of the beast, a secluded area high in the mountains where few ever tread. The beast was known only as Dou-bt, truly a terrifying creature. Armed only with his sword Hope, and his shield Friends, the adventurer decided that even if the beast didn't kill him, what was left wouldn't be Life anyway. A mighty confrontation ensued..

And the beast was slain! By fortune, by grace, the adventurer had found his inner peace and more importantly, brought joy to Hart once again. For the adventurer, a new journey would begin, but it would be on the path of Light where once he treaded in darkness.

The end of another story by a disciple of euphemism :P

* Oh forgot to add.. the ang moh runner NTU guy was referring to.. was me! LOL cos of my name i guess. Stupid... me? ang moh? no way hor

Faked out...poor judgement?

2006-01-17T19:34:00.000+08:00

Premise: You can't trust anyone!

ha maybe a bit overdoing it there, but yeah i'd say always consider the possibility that someone could be well.. less than completely honest. Yes its because i was fooled recently, maybe the person didn't set out to do it, but props to her cos i believed her 'act' and.. lesson learnt i suppose.

Am i easily fooled? I'd think so sometimes, cos i tend to give ppl the benefit of the doubt, especially ppl i know. Though if you've done it before, chances are it won't happen again as i remember stuff like this for.. a (perhaps too) long time. Have to admit i was one of those victims of the email that ask u for details of your crush and all (years ago.. I didn't forget man ><) which turned out to be a gd thing really as it made me sufficiently wary of the internet and all its scams.

So lesson learnt here, malaysians are awesome actors? have to admit, could be cultural differences or something that made me 'misunderstand' ..but thanks for clearing it all up huh?? hmph. ya well dun expect me to believe again >_>

On the flip side, i'm a mostly honest guy.. not a saint in any way though, and if its any consolation, i do feel a little sick inside when i have to lie. And don't worry the truth will out eventually.

At times i do wonder: would ppl rather hear a lie or nothing at all?

>>> I have a qn.. and no matter how painful the truth.. it could never hurt as much as a lie.

The Happy Post

2006-01-15T15:44:00.000+08:00

Well don't really like the direction this blog is taking, it seems as though my life is an endless litany of woes and sorrow... which isn't really the case i suppose. So, will take an effort to list out all the Good things going on lately.

1. I don't have many money problems, where it seems alot of ppl around me do. Its a due to a number of things really - one that my mum's salary has increased dramatically over the past few years, two that i've gotten a scholarship which helps to pay school/hostel fees plus an allowance, and three, that i've nothing much to buy really. Not worrying about where your next meal is coming from.. that's a Good thing.

2. Old and new friends have been great. Sadly, i have problems 'staying in touch' with old friends and sometimes lost some very close ones in the process. But tks to my x-ctry and 4-10 bros, for not giving up on me, and its like our friendship has evolved to the stage where it'll last whether we don't see each other for months or whatever. Means a lot. As for the Hall ppl i've come to know.. its all good.

3. (Cough syrup makin me a little drowsy here so cuttin short). Havent lost scholarship. Yet.

4. Hm, there's one more thing.. that confuses me, sometimes in a good way, sometimes not. And i think such vague statement is a gd way to end ^^. Till next time and hopefully i'll have more Good stuff to list.

Random thoughts

2006-01-12T14:04:00.000+08:00

Just some random stuff that passes thru my head:

When ppl ask 'How's life?' How was tis and that etc..', can u really tell if they're being concerned? or just polite. I suppose, the real qn is, who are the ppl that truly care enough to place your welfare above their own problems. I can only think of 2 for sure.

-but when it comes to you, sometimes the words don't matter as much as the sound of your voice, or the thought of your smile and..the only problems i have are yours

I don't like running training, and racing is even worse, for simple reasons. Its boring and painful. No i haven't learnt the 'art' of enjoying pain yet so why do it for so long? Mostly its the people.. first my coach, then the HC team, and now perhaps Eusoff hall. Ppl i respect and care abt, who made (make) it all worthwhile. Its definitely not the money ><

-if you needed me to run beyond myself, i would.. the thought of causing you pain is the worst i could imagine

The world's a complicated place because we often don't (or can't) say what we really mean. It could be -- a sense of propriety, to gain advantage, fear of consequences, or even a lack of ability to express ourselves. It seems especially obvious how limited language after writing only a little. Perhaps we need a new way to communicate, something that allows us to describe even the most evocative of experiences.

-i'm guilty, that i haven't spoken my heart, that i haven't found the words. No words could suffice... bliss could not contain warmth of your touch.. passion is but an ember in a blazing furnace.. a void isn't as empty as a world without you.

.. I think i need my medicine now.

Moments

2006-01-09T23:44:00.000+08:00

Returned to hall yesterday on the last day of holidays. It was a cold,dark and rainy night (yes seriously!) and was feeling kinda gloomy cos of all the worries i had abt the coming months. Anyway just seeing the guys again kinda lifted my spirits and things were looking up when i noticed...someone had left a GIFT on my door! No i don't mean in a sarcastic sense, cos it really was a gift and while not something extremely valuable or expensive; nevertheless touched me in a way i..kinda find myself at a loss for words to describe. I suppose this is the whole purpose for posting - abt how certain seemingly ordinary things, at the right MOMENT become well, special.

An example, maybe ppl know how crazy i am abt JJH, but its not because she's ethereally beautiful (altho she is quite :P) or because i'm partial to Korean women in any way,but i think mainly cos on another cold, dark and rainy night (hmm..) abt a year back, i watched the movie Windstruck. Perhaps it was a combination of the environment and my state of mind that turned a 'not bad' movie into something like an,epiphany of sorts. The story, the characters, everything was just sooo..heartfelt i guess u could say. And thus is a fan(atic) created..

As of now, whenever i'm with someone.. i often wonder, have i wasted the moment? once gone, will it ever come again? Yes stupid thoughts like these are gonna be a real hassle especially now school is starting. hope that writing some of them can exorcise these demons.. hm that's what the therapeutists say anyway. I'll let u know if it works.

Decisions

2006-01-07T19:54:00.000+08:00

Yes, have to admit, thought i would discontinue this blogging thing because truth is, I'm a real private person and don't really like ppl to know what I'm thinking? But.. it seemed a little early to quit (after only 1 post eesh). So. Here I am typing again.

Ok so its the first week of the new year. Maybe I'll start with the bad stuff first... one being that yeah my results didn't meet the scholarship standard of 4.0. Personally, results don't seem that important as they used to be, like, i wouldn't kill myself even if i graduated with 2nd lower honors or whatever. Then again, this scholarship is such a great opportunity.. a chance to work with Microsoft!! I can't just pass it up that easily. So.. guess next semester have to work harder than ever, probably cut down gaming and.. actually mostly gaming. Even then not sure if can really score, I mean this sem clearly revealed stuff like Maths and Physics are not my forte.. OH DOOM AND GLOOM -_-"

But wait there's more hehe. Ya end up having to run IVP again and I'm pretty sick of running trg alr actually. Plus got one of those 100 day cough things that I hope doesn't kill me when i run. Hm why did i agree to run? Kind of feel guilty that i'm staying in the hall.. but not really earning any points and stuff. A little late to join the DP and other activities, so its prob last chance to assauge my bleeding heart (drama). Ugh, competition on 21 Jan so guess I'll see if 2 weeks of trg can prevent a guy from finishing last? (my main goal *sob)

ALSO (yar but last one i think) kinda realised other than running.. don't seem to have abilities in any (useful) area. Like.. i'm supposed to be a computer engine student.. but ask me abt hardware stuff and I know nuts really. (Plus the fact that the NUS syllabus so far hasn't covered anything 'real-life' useful IMO) Can't sing, dance, cook.. that sort of thing. So is Peter all abt running? No way jose..other than studying..hope i can start learning things that will really help in life later. And i don't mean a phys ed coach ><

Woof tats a lot of complaining right? But amidst all the darkness, a ray of light has struck this one's tortured landscape of the mind. However..don't want to write anything abt it for fear of jinxing it :P.. haha ANTICLIMATIC huh?? Well written quite a lot anyway so have to save some for future posts yes? Of course, but only because I said so.

Finally...a start!

2005-12-30T13:34:00.000+08:00

Well after MUCH procrastination.. finally get round to starting this strange concept known as a blog. Its weird in a way, why put personal thoughts and experiences on such a public forum? Apparently everyone has a different reason.. some use it to stay in touch, wannabe writers fufill their aspirations, or it serves as a platform to get their message out to the world.

Why start one? In a practical sense, I hope it helps me improve my writing, maybe also let ppl (and myself) better understand what the entity Peter is all about. Can't deny that words have a power and perhaps I'll be able to wield some of it too.

Its new year's eve eve today, and Hope is the catchword for me. I'm glad its back because i felt i lost it for awhile..

to be continued